I had a friend once mention that the one thing that scared him about his girl was her indifference to a lot of things. Things didn't quite work out between the two of them, but I can see where he's coming from. There was this one guy who I had a date with one evening. I was closing late that night and the plan was he'd come get me from my office. He was a half hour late and I didn't even blink. I didn't call him to find out where he was - in either a worried or aggravated mode. Instead, I simply left. I actually saw him drive into the premises just as I got out the building, but my reaction was to duck out of sight, speed out of the gate, and switch off my phone.
I thought about what I'd just done as I walked on looking for a taxi home, and I remembered the said friend. I was indifferent. And I felt for the poor guy (who, apparently, had a moto break down, and was too preoccupied with fixing to call) who I had welshed on (really, it was to watch a match, which he would still do without me - he even came with a guy buddy to get me, so no biggie).
I wonder about all my 5-minute crushes, and these days I find I think more of the poor (? are they really?) guys and how I just might be a tad selfish. I mean, by the end of our first hang out, I may not know for sure, but I will be well aware of the (un)likelyhood of our making it into dating. But hey, I enjoy the attention, and they seem happy to dish, so I can enjoy it all while my beauty lasts right? In my defense, my conscience won't let me be, so most times I actually do get round to mentioning that it's not going to happen. No wait. What DOES happen is that I mention they won't be getting none ever in the near future seeing as I'm not into pre-marital sex, and then enjoy the leftover attention as I watch their ardour cool off as they slowly come to the comprehesion that NO, I'm not playing hard to get, and YES, if no-sex is an issue for them (which it always is, so far) they will not be making any head-way with me.
I think I'm actually in a 50/50 expectancy phase these days, cos I know there are guys out there who are christian, who strive to be faithful to the LORD's precepts in all its entirety, but really, where are they?!? Or perhaps there's something about my demeanour or counternance that is not calling to what I'm looking for... Or I'm looking for the wrong things?
Zandra's of the opinion that I just hide behind the crushes for whatever reason. What can I say, I'm just not feeling the guys? And she's very determined to see me "not blow it" with whoever, as long as I sha get to meet and acknowledge that I like any one guy. Most up front contender right now is Bami. He's been around for ever, and has just not made any verbal commitment. These days however, he's getting somewhat huggy, hand-holdingish-for-ever-so-brief-many-moments. In his favour, I'm not indifferent to him. But I'm not exactly enthralled either. On one hand, I know reality don't work with the music, and people singing and dancing on the streets, but I think I'm still holding out for even if its a little part of that. Getting with Bami will be more of "Okay, he's alright, and we get along, so I'll just move with the flow and see how it works out". Its a pretty common place choice, and he's rather nice.
On the other side, I met me another sumbori. His name's Asuquo (I know, I know. But then, the whole book cover judgement thing, ya?). He made a funny right off the bat, so he had my attention. We had a lunch which was fun, and there's possibly another outing in the offing. Unfortunately, he's into the whole 6 weeks on/off work scenario, so that could be a bummer, but we could be great hang-out buddies, yeah?
I thought about what I'd just done as I walked on looking for a taxi home, and I remembered the said friend. I was indifferent. And I felt for the poor guy (who, apparently, had a moto break down, and was too preoccupied with fixing to call) who I had welshed on (really, it was to watch a match, which he would still do without me - he even came with a guy buddy to get me, so no biggie).
I wonder about all my 5-minute crushes, and these days I find I think more of the poor (? are they really?) guys and how I just might be a tad selfish. I mean, by the end of our first hang out, I may not know for sure, but I will be well aware of the (un)likelyhood of our making it into dating. But hey, I enjoy the attention, and they seem happy to dish, so I can enjoy it all while my beauty lasts right? In my defense, my conscience won't let me be, so most times I actually do get round to mentioning that it's not going to happen. No wait. What DOES happen is that I mention they won't be getting none ever in the near future seeing as I'm not into pre-marital sex, and then enjoy the leftover attention as I watch their ardour cool off as they slowly come to the comprehesion that NO, I'm not playing hard to get, and YES, if no-sex is an issue for them (which it always is, so far) they will not be making any head-way with me.
I think I'm actually in a 50/50 expectancy phase these days, cos I know there are guys out there who are christian, who strive to be faithful to the LORD's precepts in all its entirety, but really, where are they?!? Or perhaps there's something about my demeanour or counternance that is not calling to what I'm looking for... Or I'm looking for the wrong things?
Zandra's of the opinion that I just hide behind the crushes for whatever reason. What can I say, I'm just not feeling the guys? And she's very determined to see me "not blow it" with whoever, as long as I sha get to meet and acknowledge that I like any one guy. Most up front contender right now is Bami. He's been around for ever, and has just not made any verbal commitment. These days however, he's getting somewhat huggy, hand-holdingish-for-ever-so-brief-many-moments. In his favour, I'm not indifferent to him. But I'm not exactly enthralled either. On one hand, I know reality don't work with the music, and people singing and dancing on the streets, but I think I'm still holding out for even if its a little part of that. Getting with Bami will be more of "Okay, he's alright, and we get along, so I'll just move with the flow and see how it works out". Its a pretty common place choice, and he's rather nice.
On the other side, I met me another sumbori. His name's Asuquo (I know, I know. But then, the whole book cover judgement thing, ya?). He made a funny right off the bat, so he had my attention. We had a lunch which was fun, and there's possibly another outing in the offing. Unfortunately, he's into the whole 6 weeks on/off work scenario, so that could be a bummer, but we could be great hang-out buddies, yeah?
No comments:
Post a Comment